Kindness and Chaos

The Fabulous Fuhry of an Ordinary Girl

1

Every Book Nerd’s Bookstore Experience

I read a hilarious experience list (for athletes) and thought “There needs to be one of these for book lovers”. So, here it is!

50 thoughts that every book nerd has when entering a book store:

You’re out running errands and come within a mile of your favorite book store…

  1. My favorite store is up here on the left. I wish I had time to stop.
  2. I mean, I could probably spare 20 minutes. Groceries can wait.
  3. No, I really need to go get groceries. I have nothing for dinner and am almost out of toilet paper.
  4. *turns on blinker and cuts across traffic to take a hard left* I can’t just not stop. I might hurt the book’s feelings.
  5. *parks car* Ok, I’ll just be a minute. If I can get out in 15, I can treat myself to ice cream after dinner.
  6. *walks through the door. Stops, closes eyes, takes a deep breath* AAAAHHHHHH. This is my happy place.
  7. Okay happy place. Don’t break me. I’m only spending $20 today. One dollar per minute. Ok, maybe $30.
  8. Okay. $30, in and out in 25 mins. Got it.
  9. OOOOOO bargain books.
  10. They’re practically giving these away.
  11. I need this for my collection.
  12. I’ve always wanted to read this!
  13. Oh, I love this author.
  14. I’m having trouble holding these. I think I need to go back and get a basket.
  15. *walks back to door and dumps haul into basket* Crap, I’m over my price limit, but I can’t put any of these back. They’re such a great deal! Cheaper than Amazon!
  16. I only have 7 minutes left. I better hustle.
  17. Dang it!! That means no ice cream.
  18. The only way I could love this place more was if they had an ice cream bar.
  19. What up new releases?!
  20. Oh, I heard this was so good *reads back cover*
  21. *Cute boy leans over and tries to make conversation* Does he not see that I’m trying to read here? Seriously. *Politely smiles and moves to next aisle*
  22. Oh my goodness is that a book end?! *Runs over to merchandise section*
  23. These journals are everything. I need a new one anyway *Throws in basket. Conveniently forgets the 9 blank ones scattered throughout her house*
  24. TOTES. For the love of Totes. Are these not adorbs?! I mean, quotes of literature on totes is BETTER than sliced bread. So original. Now I have to pick one. Just one.
  25. Oh a Harry Potter display. Must pay respect to the the greatest literary masterpiece of all time. *walks over to glance at display*
  26. I don’t think I have this Harry Potter theory book. *plops down in chair and begins to read*
  27. *looks at phone* I’ve been sitting here reading this for 15 minutes. I need to move on.
  28. *Looks at price tag* These people really are trying to piggyback off of Harry Potter. I bet I can find it cheaper on Amazon. Maybe the library has it! *scans bar code to update Goodreads to-read list*
  29. I seriously wish Hogwarts was a real place. It’s so not fair.
  30. “The Day the Crayons Came Home”?! I didn’t know there was a sequel!!! “The Day the Crayons Quit” is seriously one of the best children’s books written since I was a kid. They don’t write em like that anymore.
  31. Oh “The Giving Tree”. You are everything.
  32. I miss Shel Silverstein.
  33. Moment of silence.
  34. *Looks up and sees Staff Picks* Seriously, which one of you is my best friend.
  35. That’s the best you could come up with Daryl? Pfft, next.
  36. Oh Anna, I like your taste in books, sister. *throws Anna’s pick into basket*
  37. *Spots cute guy looming around the YA section. Rolls eyes in disgust* Why is he hogging the YA section? I wanted to see if they’ve released the new Riordan book yet.
  38. OH YES. The best for last. I love this section.
  39. Love this new cover art. It’s way better for the book.
  40. Oh he has a new book out. WANT
  41. *Sits on floor, pulls out books, begins reading back covers* This is brilliant. How have I not read this yet?
  42. I really have to get out of here.
  43. *Walks to check out line* Oh bookmarks! These are great, and so cheap. I need a few.
  44. Oh, these quirky greeting cards are fantastic. Why does no one get me these and bookstore gift cards for my birthday? No one understands me
  45. “Did you find everything thing ok, miss?” “Oh yes, and then some!” Hmmm, I wonder what kind of damage I did this time? Please be under $200. Please be under $200
  46. “That will be 132 dollars and 64 cents”
  47. Oh good, so much better than last time I was here.
  48. *walks out front door* Until next time sweet friend. Until next time.
  49. *Gets in car and looks at time. 2.5 hours have passed* Guess I’m getting take out tonight. I’ll just ask for extra napkins.
  50. Who has good ice cream?

-Ashley

 

Ashley • August 24, 2015


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Comments

  1. Chris Smith August 24, 2015 - 2:54 pm Reply

    I wish for #29 every day!! lol

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